Tastes like the chocolate. Just chocolate.
Plant-based chocolate. Properly creamy.
No fruit, no nuts, no theatre.
Hazelnut paste folded in.
Cocoa front and centre.
Best with anything. That’s the point. Or a glass of Sooo Original if pushed.
“The hardest bar to make. Nothing to hide behind. Just cocoa, hazelnut paste, time. If this one isn’t right, none of them are.”
Four bites’ worth of notes. Not that you’ll get to four.
Chocolate. The way it should be. Smooth, deep, unbothered.
Cocoa, hazelnut cream, time. The same three notes, slowly.
Stays clean. Doesn’t shout. Doesn’t need to.
Quiet confidence. The one in the room not trying.
Dirty Cow chocolate (cocoa, sugar, cocoa butter, hazelnut paste, shea butter, soy lecithin, natural vanilla). Made with 35% cocoa solids.
| Per | 100g | 40g serving | %RI* |
|---|---|---|---|
| Energy | 2317 kJ | 927 kJ | 11% |
| 558 kcal | 223 kcal | 11% | |
| Fat | 37.2 g | 14.9 g | 21% |
| of which saturates | 20.9 g | 8.3 g | 42% |
| Carbohydrate | 46.4 g | 21.0 g | 8% |
| of which sugars | 44.5 g | 17.8 g | 20% |
| Fibre | 6.6 g | 2.6 g | — |
| Protein | 4.6 g | 1.8 g | 4% |
| Salt | 0.01 g | 0.004 g | 1% |
*Reference intake of an average adult (8400 kJ / 2000 kcal). The bar is 80g — eat it however you like.
Yes. No dairy, no eggs, no animal anything. Hazelnut paste does the heavy lifting on the cream. We test it on a vegan focus group called “us”.
80g. About four bites for a small mood, the whole bar for a serious one. The wrapper doubles as a share bag — grab, smash, share.
Twelve months unopened, somewhere cool and dark. Realistically, twelve hours.
UK only for now. The chocolate doesn’t love long boats. We’re working on it.
Four more from the same factory. Different fruit, different mood. If you got this far, one of these is for you.
Three bars a month, our pick. Playne Jayne never far away. Cancel whenever.
Start subscription →All our bars. All our bottles. We’re as surprised as you!
Started small in a kitchen. Outgrew it. The factory came when people kept buying. The recipes never changed.
Plant-based, vegan, dairy-free and virtuous-ish since 2018.
“Playne Jayne is a quiet bar in a loud room. Bought four to make sure.”
“The bar I reach for when I’ve had a day. Which is most days.”
“No inclusions, no hiding. Just chocolate doing chocolate things. Properly.”
“I thought I wanted the fancy one. I wanted this one. Apparently I’m a Jayne now.”
“Eats like a deep breath. Recommended.”
“Playne Jayne is a quiet bar in a loud room. Bought four to make sure.”
“The bar I reach for when I’ve had a day. Which is most days.”
“No inclusions, no hiding. Just chocolate doing chocolate things. Properly.”
“I thought I wanted the fancy one. I wanted this one. Apparently I’m a Jayne now.”
“Eats like a deep breath. Recommended.”
