Tastes like the cookie. Without the cream.
Plant-based chocolate. Properly creamy.
Crumbled vegan biscuit folded through.
Hazelnut paste underneath.
The biscuit hits, then softens.
Best with a coffee. Or a stolen one from someone else’s desk.
“The original recipe had cream filling. We took it out and the bar got better. We left a name that lies a little. Sue us.”
Four bites’ worth of notes. Not that you’ll get to four.
Biscuit. Familiar, then darker. Then chocolate, deeper than expected.
Crumbs soften. Hazelnut cream takes over. Cocoa quietly underlines.
Vanilla edge, lingering. A childhood snack with a grown-up address.
A confession. Quiet but firm.
Dirty Cow chocolate (cocoa, sugar, cocoa butter, hazelnut paste, shea butter, soy lecithin, natural vanilla), cookies (fortified wheat flour (calcium carbonate, iron, niacin, thiamine), vegetable oils (palm (certified sustainable), rapeseed), sugar, oats, rice powder, sunflower lecithin, golden syrup, vanilla extract, salt, raising agent: bicarbonate of soda). Made with 35% cocoa solids.
| Per | 100g | 40g serving | %RI* |
|---|---|---|---|
| Energy | 2271 kJ | 908 kJ | 11% |
| 545 kcal | 218 kcal | 11% | |
| Fat | 35.1 g | 14.0 g | 20% |
| of which saturates | 18.0 g | 7.2 g | 36% |
| Carbohydrate | 50.5 g | 18.0 g | 7% |
| of which sugars | 40.5 g | 16.2 g | 18% |
| Fibre | 6.0 g | 2.4 g | — |
| Protein | 4.6 g | 1.9 g | 4% |
| Salt | 0.19 g | 0.08 g | 1% |
*Reference intake of an average adult (8400 kJ / 2000 kcal). The bar is 80g — eat it however you like.
Yes. No dairy, no eggs, no animal anything. Hazelnut paste does the heavy lifting on the cream. We test it on a vegan focus group called “us”.
80g. About four bites for a small mood, the whole bar for a serious one. The wrapper doubles as a share bag — grab, smash, share.
Twelve months unopened, somewhere cool and dark. Realistically, twelve hours.
UK only for now. The chocolate doesn’t love long boats. We’re working on it.
Four more from the same factory. Different fruit, different mood. If you got this far, one of these is for you.
Three bars a month, our pick. Cookies No Cream most months. Cancel whenever. It’s chocolate, not a marriage.
Start subscription →All our bars. All our bottles. We’re as surprised as you!
Started small in a kitchen. Outgrew it. The factory came when people kept buying. The recipes never changed.
Plant-based, vegan, dairy-free and virtuous-ish since 2018.
“Cookies No Cream is the closest I’ve come to disrespecting a friend’s chocolate.”
“The cream wasn’t doing much heavy lifting anyway. This is the upgrade.”
“I’m vegan but I don’t want my chocolate to introduce itself as vegan. This one doesn’t.”
“Bought to try. Bought again. Bought as a gift. Did not give the gift.”
“The biscuit is a proper biscuit. The chocolate is a proper chocolate. Both showed up.”
“Cookies No Cream is the closest I’ve come to disrespecting a friend’s chocolate.”
“The cream wasn’t doing much heavy lifting anyway. This is the upgrade.”
“I’m vegan but I don’t want my chocolate to introduce itself as vegan. This one doesn’t.”
“Bought to try. Bought again. Bought as a gift. Did not give the gift.”
“The biscuit is a proper biscuit. The chocolate is a proper chocolate. Both showed up.”
